Late Night Surprise

Thursday night I barely slept. With no air conditioning, my girlfriend tossing and turning next to me, and continued passing of cars on the street, I had little hope of rest. I am terrible with out sleep, though I am not grumpy I have a hard time doing things without my standard eight hours. Even through all the commotion, I think I passed out around 3 AM only to be woken at 4 AM by an index finger poking me in the ribs and a voice saying "Jim, I think Sofee's nail is caught in the blanket". I was like "Huh?", then heard my puppy crying in her crate. This is the first time Sofee has gotten me out of bed in quite some time. She usually gets up around six, regretfully, takes her time to do her daily stretch routine, walks to the end of the stairs and lies down as if to say "my life is so hard". Eventually, and after much coaxing, she comes to the kitchen so that I can put her leash on and take her out to pee.
Well, I don't know what got into her that night, maybe it was the thunder, but she was crying like she was hurt. I got out of bed still 7/8 asleep, opened her cage to see what was wrong, and before I could bend over to look, Sofee jets out of the cage. She runs right to the bed, across Rachelle's head and starts peeing right where I sleep, right on the bed.
This quickly woke Rachelle up as hot dog urine should. I run across the room, grab the dog, and hold her at arm's length. Now only 3/8 sleeping, I began frantically looking for pants so I can take Sofee out to complete her mistake. Rachelle is trying to clean up the mess, but she was still 99/100 asleep, and I'm like, "where are my pants WHERE ARE MY PANTS AHHHHHH". I put some boxers on and decided that was enough given the present circumstances. Rachelle changed the sheets as I took the dog out.

Man, I can't even imagine having kids.